SPECULATORS VS LAWYERS RANT 5-24-12

Good Morning All,
So was it Shakespeare who said "Kill all the Lawyers"? I'm not sure, but there may be a paradigm shift coming in our society. Oh, I still share the view of the "AMBULANCE CHASING", BLOODSUCKING PREDATORY LEECHES, that populate our legal profession. All you have to do is turn on the TV and watch the ad's that blame everything we touch, breathe, eat, or use, for everything that ails us. The ads then purport that all you have to do is call their law firm to "cash in". These "LEGAL TERMITES" are worse than a 60's used car salesman.

BUT.....Although gas prices have dropped slightly, and still hover over $3.50 a gal, we need to consider why prices are where they are. NO, it's not the Middle Eastern countries and their evil plot to destroy America, think about it, if they don't sell Western nations oil, they go back to GOAT HERDING! The problem is not supply and demand. Consider that demand is down as American's have responded. Supply is not the issue as oil producing countries and companies have adjusted their production. Here is the problem..The BLOODSUCKING LEECHES of the 21st Century, "THE SPECULATOR". The "GAMBLING ANTICS" of these "GREEDY SLUGS" of the financial world, affects and controls many of the prices we pay for commodities. They speculate, (I call it gambling!) on all items ranging from gas to food to real estate. There isn't one segment of the SUPPLY CHAIN that they won't gamble on.

Some may say they are just HEDGING their bets, but that's CRAP! Once these "LEGAL PICKPOCKETS" get their share they could care less what happens to you. They artifically inflate prices on all the goods and services we receive and leave nothing but debris in their "COCKAROACH" like motis operandi. They take..take..take..and give nothing in return. DON'T FORGET THE HOUSING CRISIS, from which we have yet to recover from.

SOOOOO...I say "KILL ALL THE LAWYERS", But save some ammo for the "SPECULATORS"

                                                                       I'M DONE!

"PERSONAL SPACE" Rant 4-16-12

Good Morning All,

I bet you all thought I fell off the face of the earth! Some of you may have even been rejoicing. What an appropriate day for a rant...TAX DAY!!! AAAAHHHHH. (Sorry, I got lost!)

So what the hell has become of our personal space??? You remember that little zone around your body that people who don't know you wouldn't enter...(Kinda like an invisble dog fence...just sayin :)

I've noticed more and more that the hapless souls around you feel the more they crowd you the faster the lines will move! I had one MANNEQUIN get so close to me in a line this morning I was going to ask to see the wedding ring!!

I mean really have you noticed, how you are crowded in bank, supermarket, and coffee lines? I don't even want to mention amusment parks, zoo's, airline security lines, and my favorite...THE DMV! And have you ever tried to buy tickets at a sporting event or even ice cream at at carryout window? (they should play striptease music with all the bumping and grinding going on) I am sure you have all had you instances of these HUMAN GNOME FAILURES crowding you.

Hey, don't get me wrong, there are some instances where the crowding would be acceptable, but that's another Rant :) However, most of the time the people crowding you could use a bath, clean clothes, and improved dental hygiene.

Look here is a great rule of thumb...I don't want to smell your BO, cigarette breath, after shave, or be able to identify what brand of curry you ate for lunch. If your cultural beliefs, personal beliefs, or just plain laziness, prevents you from changing clothes, using deodorant, brushing your teeth, or combing the lice out of your hair...STAY AT A SAFE DISTANCE!  IF YOU CAN READ THE SMALL PRINT ON MY JEANS LOGO, YOUR TOO DAMN CLOSE!

Oh yea, and while were at it...I don't want to see your pound cake stomach hanging over the  ill fitting shorts the don't cover the crack of your A*%, or your nasty disgusting non-maintained feet hanging over the HELLO KITTY flip flops you procured from your daughter!

AND ANOTHER THING! I don't want to listen to your music, read your email, or listen to last night's experience! (which gave me a vision of two african hippo's) Keep your phone conversations to your self!!!!

The BOTTOM LINE is; IF I CAN HEAR YOUR BUSINESS, YOU CAN HEAR MINE! STAY THE HELL BACK!

 There is a reason the gene pool has become refined over the years, and today I experienced it!!

I'M DONE!

"WHERE ARE THE COPS?" Rant for 2-23-12

Good Morning. I hope everyone is well.

I need to make everyone aware of a crime that travels under the radar. I think it's time the police stop being distracted by the "petty" crimes of murder, assault and fraud. Terrorism could also take a back seat to the "HEINOUS" crime I have been subjected to!

They need to increase the resources and manpower to prevent the dangerous, unsettling, and nefarious crime of "GROCERY THEFT"! YES, GROCERY THEFT!!

What the hell are you laughing at????  Maybe many of you have experienced this assualt on your efforts to refill your pantry, but I have not! These "BAG-GRABBING TROLLS" have really irked me!

The day was proceeding as normal when I stopped at the store to buy items for dinner. Who could have forseen the events that what shake me to the core. After spending time at the deli counter with crying babies and a "walker-wielding" senior, who ran over my foot while smiling, (I think she did it on purpose!) I headed for the checkout.

After checking out and heading home I found I was a bag short..I thought I had forgotten it and headed back to the store. Then I realized that I had only two bags when I left the store, because that was what was on the counter. When I asked the checkout girl about the other bag, she told me that the person in front of me probably took it, and that it happens all the time. WHAT??? She then directed me to the courtesy counter to solve my dilemma.

Do you know how embarrassing it is to tell a young woman that someone stole "YOUR MEAT"!!! I felt so humiliated and ashamed. HOW WOULD YOU FEEL???

I want these "SEWER LIZARDS" captured and tortured!

HEY, STOP LAUGHING, IT COULD'VE BEEN YOUR MEAT!

I'M DONE!

"Against Myself" Rant for 2-06-12

Good Morning, (Oh hell not really!)

Have you ever had a day that you didn't even want to be around yourself, and when every little thing was going wrong?? I think they are "Linus or Charlie Brown" moments. I can't remember which and this morning I really don't care!

Let's start with yesterday morning when my wife woke me up to inform me of the unceremonious death of our water heater! It wasn't even light out yet!

I was pretty impressed with myself when I arranged to have a service crew out by 8:30am. How was I to know that was my last "happy moment" of the day. After being informed by the service tech that our water heater was truly dead, and the "lottery winnings"(a slight exaggeration) needed to replace it, the fun began.

After contacting my son and asking him to install it. (I really appreciate him saying OK as opposed to laughing, and telling me where I could fly) I spent the next 8 unproductive hours researching the difference between "regular", "short", "medium", "tall", and custom size units as well as "glass", "ceramic", or "metal lined" tanks! I was waiting to see "animal skinned"! Oh yea , and I haven't even gotten to "single element", "double element" or "chimp riding a bike" power at 3800 watts or 4500 watts! Then there is "20amp, 30amp, and "candle power". The ultimate wild card however, is my wife's budget.

After many hours of searching and researching I finally found a suitable unit. I was once again feeling "the man power", but naturally the feeling didn't last when I found there was a two week wait for delivery. But as most intelligent "male chimps" I had a plan B and put it into action. What a happy chimp I was when it came together. I paid for the unit and arranged to pick it up today.

Well today is a new day and I am once again feeling "the power", but once again not so fast. I woke up early and decided to do some paperwork before picking up the new water heater. Well, when I fired up the computer I got the "Danger Will Robinson" blue screen. I apparently have some kind of issue. My mood is now starting to go south and I haven't even been up and hour...GGGRRR

I spent the next hour "Hunting Computer Gremlins" which I fortuitously learned to do many years ago. Fortunately I was able to re-index my hard drive and solve the problem. I then went to pick up the new life sustaining appliance. (If you have a family with a teenage child you know why a water heater is a life saving appliance :)

When I get to the store I am pleased to see I am the first one heading to "merchandise pick-up" until, while looking down at my phone (as most of we human robots do while walking) I walked straight into a closed, locked glass door! (this provided extreme amusement to the employee's standing inside) Apparently the store didn't open for another 10 min!

Well I am finally inside and less than 10 min later they bring out the shiny object that will restore order and harmony to my world! I am ready to go, but oh no, it's not that easy! When we go outside to load the shiny object, a UPS truck is not only blocking the door, but also my truck! Keep in mind I am the only vehicle in the "customer loading area" There are at least 6 SPOTS! Why block me???

After 20 minutes of waiting, this driver doing his best imitation of a "Government Employee", decides to come out. He then gets an attitude when the store employee asks him to move the truck! The store employee also reminds him that customers have priority over deliveries, and that he should be at the loading dock and not the door...GO EMPLOYEE!

Finally we get "The Holy Grail" loaded and I am on my way! By now, as any self respecting chimp would want, I just want to get back to my tree, but there is still one more obstacle to overcome on my quest!

I am about 30 feet away from the turn on my road when "LO and BEHOLD" a  "HUMAN DUMMY" with a stop sign attached has the road closed! I am now forced to drive 6 miles around and come in the back way to get home. Considering I was 30 ft away from the turn, I am "NOT HAPPY"!  I started jumping on the seat and waving my arms like a chimp protecting his territory!

Finally, I get back to my tree and I am safely inside..My mood is so horrendous I don't even want to look in the mirror! I think I am going back to bed and put a "Tarzan" movie on! Maybe "Cheetah" can calm me down. If you don't know who Tarzan and Cheetah are TO BAD!!!!

I'M DONE!!

"WHO IS GETTING THE MONEY?" Rant for 2-01-12

Good Morning,
I know I haven't been ranting much, but it's amazing how life, and sometimes lack of motivation get's in the way. Sadly, there is no shortage of issues to rant about, and the sheer volume of subjects, from general discourtesy, downright rudness, to flat out dishonesty is overwhelming.

Today instead of "Ranting" I am posting the content of an e-mail I have received many times. I don't know who the original author is, but whether you are right, left, center, independent, or kangaroo it applies to all of us.

The people we have entrusted to run our country, state, and local governments, just do not care what we think. They continue to double dip everything that is funded by our tax dollars while screaming "poor mouth". Nowhere is this more evident than in our social security system, transportation funds at the state level, and the double-dipping of pensions at the local level. All the while jobs are at a premium.

With no further "pontificating" read below. This one only targets Social Security but there are many other programs that bear scrutinizing.

Who Gets Your Social Security When You Die?

"I didn't do or check the math on this, but I think that people really need to stop calling SS an entitlement like it is a dirty word. I think of it more as repaying a loan that the government borrowed from us.

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT

THE ONLY THING WRONG WITH THIS CALCULATION IS THEY FORGOT TO FIGURE IN THE PEOPLE WHO DIED BEFORE THEY COLLECTED THEIR SOCIAL SECURITY!!!! WHERE DID THAT MONEY GO?????????????

This was sent to me, I am sending it on because it does touch a nerve in me.

This is another example of what Rick Perry called "TREASON in high places"!!!

Remember, not only did you contribute to Social Security but your employer did too. It totaled 15% of your income before taxes. If you averaged only $30K over your working life, that's close to $220,500.

If you calculate the future value of $4,500 per year (yours & your employer's contribution) at a simple 5% (less than what the government pays on the money that it borrows), after 49 years of working you'd have $892,919.98.

If you took out only 3% per year, you'd receive $26,787.60 per year and it would last better than 30 years (until you're 95 if you retire at age 65) and that's with no interest paid on that final amount on deposit! If you bought an annuity and it paid 4% per year, you'd have a lifetime income of $2,976.40 per month.

The folks in Washington have pulled off a bigger Ponzi scheme than Bernie Madoff ever had.

Entitlement my ass, I paid cash for my social security insurance!!!! Just because they borrowed the money, doesn’t make my benefits some kind of charity or handout!!

Congressional benefits ---- free healthcare, outrageous  retirement packages, 67 paid holidays, three weeks paid  vacation, unlimited paid sick days, now that's welfare, and  they have the nerve to call my social security retirement  entitlements?

We're "broke" and can't help our own Seniors, Veterans, Orphans or Homeless.

In the last months we have provided aid to Haiti, Chile, and Turkey. And now Pakistan ......home of bin Laden. Literally, BILLIONS of DOLLARS!!!

Our retired seniors living on a 'fixed income'  receive no aid nor do they get any breaks while our  government and religious organizations pour Hundreds  of Billions of $$$$$$'s and Tons of Food to Foreign Countries!

They call Social Security and Medicare an entitlement even though most of us have been paying for it all our working lives and now when it's time for us to collect, the government is running out of money.

Why did the government borrow from it in the first place? Imagine if the *GOVERNMENT* gave 'US' the same support they give to other countries. "

Sad isn't it?

Remember there arer very few that do not have to figure Social Security in their retirement plan!

Just food for thought kiddies, PT Barnum said one was born every minute..HHHHHHMMMM

I'M DONE!

"EVOLUTION OF MAN" Rant For 1-09-12

Well, this is my first RANT of the New Year! I hope everyone had a fantastic holiday. ours was fine, but as always I am my own worst enemy, but that's a different rant. :)

Recently, I observed what I consider a shining example of how far human intelligence has taken us. I had stopped at one of my favorite convenience stores to fill up my truck, and get coffee. This is where I must have entered an alternate universe, or the twilight zone where nothing is as it seems.

I pulled to the gas pump and filled my tank and then proceeded inside to pay for the fuel, and also to get coffee. Upon leaving the store I observed a shining example of why we should "THIN THE HERD"!

Now we all know, have been taught, or at least are vaguely aware of the potential dangers of smoking, or speaking on a cell phone while fueling! I am going to give one better....hang on it's coming! Don't be so impatient.

As I said, upon leaving the store I observed a prime example of why some animals "EAT THEIR YOUNG"!  Directly across from me is what I can only describe as a "PRIMORDIAL THROWBACK" LEANING AGAINST THE GAS PUMP, WHILE SMOKING A CIGARETTE, AND TALKING ON HIS CELL PHONE! now here is the good part! HIS ENGINE WAS RUNNING WHILE HE WAS PUMPING THE GAS!!!

Now don't get me wrong, I have my "BILL ENGVALL" moments, and should be given a sign.(If you don't know who Bill Engvall is Google is wonderful.)  I also know some of us take a chance on cold mornings and leave our engines running while fueling, but honestly, temperatures here in Maryland have rarely been below 50 this fall and winter. Even if they were, how many of you would stand there, smoke, talk on your phone, and leave you engine running while gassing up??? If you raised your hand, please proceed to the nearest forest and put antlers on during deer season!

 I began contemplating the odds of making it to my truck, (which was two pumps down) and getting out of there before the "IMPENDING FIREBALL" destroyed the whole damn block. I also had the urge to "SMACK THIS GUY IN THE HEAD"and "TAKE HIS PICTURE", but I didn't want to waste valuable escape time. I did feel a little bad while walking to my truck, because I didn't shout to the other people at the pumps, but they did seem to be moving a little faster than normal :)

What was really worrying me was the thought that this "HUMAN SEEDLING" had possibly bred! I also thought; If his home stove pilot light goes out, "DOES HE CHECK IT WITH A MATCH"?However, I really didn't think of it long, because I noticed I was "PEELING RUBBER" as I left the gas station, with an unusual amount of cars on my bumper.

I think I've made a good case for "THINNING THE HERD" and why this guy should be "FOOD FOR OTHER SPECIES"

I'M DONE!