One of the most frustrating things I find is the "Rat Maze" effect created by retail stores.
What do I mean by "Rat Maze"? How many times have you walked in to a store that you have been to a thousand times, walked right to where you know something is, only to find it's no longer there?
What evil marketing denizen of the dark, came up with this diabolical master plan? The srtategy is obviously to get you to to wander through store so you will buy more impluse items. How about this brainiacs, I shop at the same store locations because I know the planogram! If I am in a hurry I come in, buy what I need and get out! I don't want to go to my favorite office supply store to buy pens for my employee's, only to find that instead of being in front of the store, they are now in the back in the opposite corner. The same thing applies to my favorite grocery store. If I come in to buy something quick for dinner, I don't want it to turn into a 2hr shopping trip!
Stop trying to mess with with our heads and increase our time in your store. It doesn't do anything but make us shop somewhere else. We don't need to be manipulated and have our intelligence insulted purely for you profit.
Do I need to tell you what you can do with your ivy league buisness degree? I resent being treated like "sheeple"
I'm Done
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Monday, February 7, 2011
You Can't Make This Up Rant 2-07-11
OK admittedly I didn't read the whole story because I was laughing to hard...
Our society is teetering on the edge of the ludicrous and ridiculous :-) This morning traffic and court business was brought to a complete standstill in Towson, MD because of...wait for it....a TOILET!
Yes, boys and girls a toilet! This toilet had a cell phone taped to it and was reported as a "suspicious object" sitting outside the county courthouse..This "suspicious object" had police and firefighters tied up for most of the day. The street did not open until early afternoon. How long does it take to identify a toilet??
C'mon really, did this oatmeal brained terrorist wanna-be really carry a toilet through downtown Towson with no one noticing? AMAZING! I think it would have been more effective if someone had been sitting on it, because after all Towson is the "COUNTY SEAT" and we all know that politician's are "FULL OF CRAP".
All right, it's time to "FLUSH" this rant..(Sorry, I couldn't help it) Visual below.
Our society is teetering on the edge of the ludicrous and ridiculous :-) This morning traffic and court business was brought to a complete standstill in Towson, MD because of...wait for it....a TOILET!
Yes, boys and girls a toilet! This toilet had a cell phone taped to it and was reported as a "suspicious object" sitting outside the county courthouse..This "suspicious object" had police and firefighters tied up for most of the day. The street did not open until early afternoon. How long does it take to identify a toilet??
C'mon really, did this oatmeal brained terrorist wanna-be really carry a toilet through downtown Towson with no one noticing? AMAZING! I think it would have been more effective if someone had been sitting on it, because after all Towson is the "COUNTY SEAT" and we all know that politician's are "FULL OF CRAP".
All right, it's time to "FLUSH" this rant..(Sorry, I couldn't help it) Visual below.
I'm Done.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Bloodsuckers Rant For 2-06-11
Talk about over the top. How many ambulance chasing, bloodsucking attorney ads are needed on TV?
These vampires want you to believe that everything that goes wrong in your life is somebody else's fault and they are there to make it right! Don't believe it, these pocket-wringing con-men wouldn't help you if you were falling off a cliff, unless there was a buck in it. The outrageous fees these people charge are usually more than any settlement their clients receive. Hell, most of them didn't even pass the bar until their 3rd try.
I am tired of hearing that my headaches are caused by medical malpractice, that my upset stomach is caused by poor quality medication, and that the beef mix that Taco Bell serves is not a 100% beef! Surprise, if you are expecting 100% beef from a $.79 taco then I have land in the middle of the Chesapeake for sale.
What's the saying about lawyers? I would quote it but some "politically correct" moron would say I am advocating violence.
I'm Done
These vampires want you to believe that everything that goes wrong in your life is somebody else's fault and they are there to make it right! Don't believe it, these pocket-wringing con-men wouldn't help you if you were falling off a cliff, unless there was a buck in it. The outrageous fees these people charge are usually more than any settlement their clients receive. Hell, most of them didn't even pass the bar until their 3rd try.
I am tired of hearing that my headaches are caused by medical malpractice, that my upset stomach is caused by poor quality medication, and that the beef mix that Taco Bell serves is not a 100% beef! Surprise, if you are expecting 100% beef from a $.79 taco then I have land in the middle of the Chesapeake for sale.
What's the saying about lawyers? I would quote it but some "politically correct" moron would say I am advocating violence.
I'm Done
Friday, February 4, 2011
Vanity Plates and Bumper Sticker Rant 2-04-11
So, I've been thinking, (I know, what a concept :-) what could be one of the most dangerous distractions on the highway today. Hmmmm, could it be cell phones? No I don't think so. Could it be women applying makeup? Nah! How about Mr. Super-Ego reading a report? Not likely! I know, the drunken driver, what could be more distracting or dangerous...But, have you ever considered the DREADED vanity plate or the UNREADABLE bumper sticker?? Oh yes, these benign looking items appear harmless on the surface, but how many times have you found yourself inching closer to the car ahead of you trying to read a bumper sticker, or understand the warped logic of a vanity plate??
It would't be so bad if these nano-brains used the proper "size to space ratio" to print a bumper sticker large enough to read, rather than the format of small lines on an eye chart. It would also be nice if they could use their immense dispoable income (these things aren't cheap) to order a vanity plate that didn't need a cryptologist to decipher it!
I don't know what attracts me to these imbecilic quotes like a moth to a flame. Why should I care if your bumper sticker says "Lost Cat? Look Under My Tires" or "Driver Carries No Cash- He's Married". What difference does it make if I understand your "H8MEAT" or 2DUM2NO" vanity plate? Why do I care, because they FRUSTRATE THE HELL OUT OF ME when I can't read them...Don't laugh, you know these cro-magnon examples of self expression have the same effect on most of you!
I wonder how many rear end accidents were caused this way? By us inching up to read and understand these ridiculously unimportant messages of vanity, when suddenly the brake lights came on!! OUCH!
I wonder if they keep statistics on this cause of rear end accidents, Does it go in the report I wonder?
Sorry officer, I was talking on my cell phone ;-) Wouldn't you?
I have included a few samples for your amusement, and how would you interpret this vanity plate? "GRLSRUS" Girls are Us, Grills are Us, how about Gorillas??
It would't be so bad if these nano-brains used the proper "size to space ratio" to print a bumper sticker large enough to read, rather than the format of small lines on an eye chart. It would also be nice if they could use their immense dispoable income (these things aren't cheap) to order a vanity plate that didn't need a cryptologist to decipher it!
I don't know what attracts me to these imbecilic quotes like a moth to a flame. Why should I care if your bumper sticker says "Lost Cat? Look Under My Tires" or "Driver Carries No Cash- He's Married". What difference does it make if I understand your "H8MEAT" or 2DUM2NO" vanity plate? Why do I care, because they FRUSTRATE THE HELL OUT OF ME when I can't read them...Don't laugh, you know these cro-magnon examples of self expression have the same effect on most of you!
I wonder how many rear end accidents were caused this way? By us inching up to read and understand these ridiculously unimportant messages of vanity, when suddenly the brake lights came on!! OUCH!
I wonder if they keep statistics on this cause of rear end accidents, Does it go in the report I wonder?
Sorry officer, I was talking on my cell phone ;-) Wouldn't you?
I have included a few samples for your amusement, and how would you interpret this vanity plate? "GRLSRUS" Girls are Us, Grills are Us, how about Gorillas??
I'm done
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Packaging Rant for 2-3-11
Ok, I admit it, I am probably not smarter than a 5th grader, but I'll bet most of you aren't either :-)
What sado-masochist invented @#$%& blister packaging??? This rubik's cube of product covering has been driving us over the edge for years...and is it me, or is it getting worse!
Have you tried opening the internal bag in a box of cereal, or how about a bag of potato chips? It's a freaking conspiracy! How come the only one that can open a child proof cap is a CHILD!
From the wrappings on a block of chedder cheese, and CD's, to the blister packs on cold tablets, and Christmas toys, we are slowly being driven insane!! Whose behind it, what evil mastermind has targeted us for such torture? We need to know who could do such a thing? We need to think of the future of our children...and, oh wait.
Sorry, you need to disregard this rant, I was just reminded I work in the food packaging industry...Whoops my bad :O
What sado-masochist invented @#$%& blister packaging??? This rubik's cube of product covering has been driving us over the edge for years...and is it me, or is it getting worse!
Have you tried opening the internal bag in a box of cereal, or how about a bag of potato chips? It's a freaking conspiracy! How come the only one that can open a child proof cap is a CHILD!
From the wrappings on a block of chedder cheese, and CD's, to the blister packs on cold tablets, and Christmas toys, we are slowly being driven insane!! Whose behind it, what evil mastermind has targeted us for such torture? We need to know who could do such a thing? We need to think of the future of our children...and, oh wait.
Sorry, you need to disregard this rant, I was just reminded I work in the food packaging industry...Whoops my bad :O
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Rant For 2-02-11
I had a whole different rant planned for today, but sometimes fate steps in and give you the material. A couple of things happened today that just served to remind me how ridiculously rude we have become. The ape like behaviour of these two "mensa" candidates, has prompted me to give them a "Chimp In Excellence" award. I am even attaching a photo of the award. I think we should all congratulate these two "poop throwers" for their overachievment in rudeness. I am humbled to have come in contact with these evolutionary misfits. Now on with their incredible stories...
Item #1- Since I am on "son to school" transportation duty this week, we leave a little earlier in the morning so we can beat the traffic. One of the things that I like to do is stop at the McDonald's across the parking lot from his school for us to have breakfast. It gives us a minute to talk.
We are in line waiting to place our order when a man with the speed of Superman and obviously at death's door from hunger decides an egg McMuffin is the only thing that can possibly save him. Waiting in line is just not an option. He literally bumped me out of the way! When I comment to my son (loud enough for the obviously dying man to hear) that "excuse me" would have been nice, this chimp award reciepient promptly grabs his food and is gone in a flash, completely ignoring me. I am however glad he was saved.. Well done!
Item #1 was just a warm up.
Item#2- After having lunch today, as is my usual custom, I stopped at Dunkin Donuts for my usual extra-large decaf. Anyone that knows me is aware that I drink a gallon of coffee a day. (hence the decaf) Well, the drive thru is unusually busy today, so there was a waiting line. After waiting patiently for my turn (yes I am patient once in awhile :), I placed my order and moved forward as much as I could. Suddenly I hear this blaring horn behind me and when I turn to see what is wrong, chimp award receipient number 2 is screaming at me to move forward so he can place his order. Well, as in the previous case, this chimp groomer is either dying of hunger and only a box of munchkins can save him, or he is afraid they are going to run out of sprinkled donuts. In any case, I couldn't move forward as there was a car less than a foot in front me. I don't know where he thought he was going to go once he placed his order because there was 4 cars ahead of us..Did he think a car-hop was going to come out the back door and deliver his order? But even with all of this I am still glad he was saved. It makes me proud to give him this award.
So without further ado..I herby give this "Chimp in Excellence" award to poop thrower and chimp groomer...They should be so proud! Lets all of reflect on the behaviour of these receipients, and the inspiration and example they provide.
I'm done!
Item #1- Since I am on "son to school" transportation duty this week, we leave a little earlier in the morning so we can beat the traffic. One of the things that I like to do is stop at the McDonald's across the parking lot from his school for us to have breakfast. It gives us a minute to talk.
We are in line waiting to place our order when a man with the speed of Superman and obviously at death's door from hunger decides an egg McMuffin is the only thing that can possibly save him. Waiting in line is just not an option. He literally bumped me out of the way! When I comment to my son (loud enough for the obviously dying man to hear) that "excuse me" would have been nice, this chimp award reciepient promptly grabs his food and is gone in a flash, completely ignoring me. I am however glad he was saved.. Well done!
Item #1 was just a warm up.
Item#2- After having lunch today, as is my usual custom, I stopped at Dunkin Donuts for my usual extra-large decaf. Anyone that knows me is aware that I drink a gallon of coffee a day. (hence the decaf) Well, the drive thru is unusually busy today, so there was a waiting line. After waiting patiently for my turn (yes I am patient once in awhile :), I placed my order and moved forward as much as I could. Suddenly I hear this blaring horn behind me and when I turn to see what is wrong, chimp award receipient number 2 is screaming at me to move forward so he can place his order. Well, as in the previous case, this chimp groomer is either dying of hunger and only a box of munchkins can save him, or he is afraid they are going to run out of sprinkled donuts. In any case, I couldn't move forward as there was a car less than a foot in front me. I don't know where he thought he was going to go once he placed his order because there was 4 cars ahead of us..Did he think a car-hop was going to come out the back door and deliver his order? But even with all of this I am still glad he was saved. It makes me proud to give him this award.
So without further ado..I herby give this "Chimp in Excellence" award to poop thrower and chimp groomer...They should be so proud! Lets all of reflect on the behaviour of these receipients, and the inspiration and example they provide.
I'm done!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Rant For 2-01-11
Where to begin...
Today's rant is once again inspired by a conversation with a colleague. We were discussing jobs and how little manufacturing we do in this country.(You may remember my rant of 1-27 scratching the surface of this issue)
We began discussing the flood of inferior foreign imports that plague our country, when my colleague suggested I check my local supermarket to see just how pervasive these imports have become.
What I found was unbelievable! (Again, I must be slow!) Are the brains of all americans in a cryogenic state? Why would we need to #$@@$# import food??? Need proof? Start looking at labels in the grocery store, it's like having cold water thrown in your face.
Have we become such a "Jabba the Hud" society that we can no longer feed ourselves? Is it truly so much cheaper to import food than to grow it ourselves? I find that nauseating! What mind-control genius sold us this bill of goods! Oh that's right, we bought in to the utopion program called NAFTA! The program that was supposed to open up foreign markets to american products and increase our prosperity. What a joke! The only people that prospered were those who had stock in companies that had moved their manufacturing overseas. Oh Yea, and the nation's most organized flea market of foreign goods, WALMART!
If we don't get off our video-gaming butts and start making something we are going to be doing laundry for China and India. Think long and hard what you want for your children.
I have thought of another acronym for NAFTA..but unfortunately I can't spell it out without offending people.
I'm done
Today's rant is once again inspired by a conversation with a colleague. We were discussing jobs and how little manufacturing we do in this country.(You may remember my rant of 1-27 scratching the surface of this issue)
We began discussing the flood of inferior foreign imports that plague our country, when my colleague suggested I check my local supermarket to see just how pervasive these imports have become.
What I found was unbelievable! (Again, I must be slow!) Are the brains of all americans in a cryogenic state? Why would we need to #$@@$# import food??? Need proof? Start looking at labels in the grocery store, it's like having cold water thrown in your face.
Have we become such a "Jabba the Hud" society that we can no longer feed ourselves? Is it truly so much cheaper to import food than to grow it ourselves? I find that nauseating! What mind-control genius sold us this bill of goods! Oh that's right, we bought in to the utopion program called NAFTA! The program that was supposed to open up foreign markets to american products and increase our prosperity. What a joke! The only people that prospered were those who had stock in companies that had moved their manufacturing overseas. Oh Yea, and the nation's most organized flea market of foreign goods, WALMART!
If we don't get off our video-gaming butts and start making something we are going to be doing laundry for China and India. Think long and hard what you want for your children.
I have thought of another acronym for NAFTA..but unfortunately I can't spell it out without offending people.
I'm done
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